Just Do It

By: Faith Pearce

(4 min read)

I feel like I have been going round in circles. I have always had a curious mind. When I cut out caffeine from my diet many years ago, I had really bad withdrawal symptoms. Tiredness was a big one, but the worst symptom was the constant headaches. Some may think ok, this is normal. But I wanted to know why. What causes the headaches. SO, I researched it. Caffeine narrows the blood vessels to the brain which is why it is good at relieving headaches. When the capillaries narrow, it takes the pressure off the nerves and relieves pain. 

So when the caffeine is no longer there, the blood vessels then expand causing painful headaches. Once I found this out, it made sense, and I had the knowledge for the reason “why.”

My mind is like this with most things. I do spin on many subjects. I do think about many subjects. But the main consistency is that I want to understand everything regarding a subject. Then, the true ride begins. I can be led in many different directions. For those of you who have been following my blogs, it won’t surprise you why my blog column is called Faith’s Brain Dumps. Ping. Circle. Back again. Round and round again. Go deep. Or not.

I have also been thinking recently, why do I ask or need to know the “why?” Is it curiosity, is it a need to feel in control of my situation. Or is it an avoidance and internal distraction from thinking about other things. 

This brings me full circle to my blog, I have been struggling to find my flow recently. There have been so many ideas going around in my head, I couldn’t settle on one thing I wanted to write about. I have been jumping from one thought to another. Bouncing around in quite a restless way. And I came back to ok…why? Here is one of my points…I am now right back to where I started.

I used to be really bad at procrastinating. As much as I have improved, I know I still do it at times. Lately instead of spinning in my head asking questions over and over, I have been just sitting in the thoughts and observing them. I thought, ok today I am going to do things differently. 

I’m not going to talk about all the different reasons why we procrastinate, it’s a HUGE topic, and I will discuss it in the future. Today, I am going to focus on one thing. Normally, I would have stopped in the thought and done some spinning while researching different reasons why people procrastinate. 

So…I thought, ok where does procrastination start, what causes it, is there a mirage of thoughts or am I bombarded with feelings. What the hell is really going on?

The first thing I noticed in the internal dialogue was the self-talk. Don’t do that…what if you get it wrong…what is the point…nobody likes you…you always fuck everything up…you will just keep doing it. 

At this moment, I am not challenging this voice, just observing. We all have that internal dialogue, the devil/angel conversation. You can’t do something as opposed to just trying it. The fear of making mistakes takes over nearly every aspect of our life at some point. The kudos are rare…you did that really well, and you have improved since last time. 

What struck me is during every episode of procrastination there is always an initial conversation. And they always start out negatively. And then I get caught up in self-doubt, and lose my confidence. It is exhausting working to build myself back up again. Digging up all those positive one-liners makes me want to take another nap…come on, look how far you have come, it’s ok to make mistakes, you are not a bad person, be gentle on yourself, change is good, and you are learning all the time. 

If I just stepped back from the whole conversation and just did it…Just Do It like Nike says…my devil/angel conversation would never take place. Actually, the angel would show up because she would be proud of me.

So today I am working on recognizing each and every time I hear that negative voice, stopping and breathing and recentering myself.

And just doing. Because each time I stop diving down the rabbit hole and get on with it, I remind myself, I can do this. I am then reminded of all the times I have succeeded. This isn’t about winning, it is about keeping commitments to myself and not sabotaging where I’m going, and about not over-analyzing where I have been.

I know I have been feeling out of my comfort zone recently and when faced with change it can feel strange and unfamiliar. I have been looking for something that feels normal which usually means looking back into the vast knowledge bank of what I know. I try to regain some control when I feel unsure. It took a bit to realize my internal compass was a little off.  

If I could share one thing with you it would be, the next time you feel any self-doubt or if you think you cannot do something, be aware of where that voice is coming from. Then switch that voice around, and remember you always have a choice whether you listen to the devil or the angel.

 

Faith Pearce 
                                                                     All Things Wellness, LLC
                                                                 fancyfaith1234@icloud.com

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