Everybody Needs An Alice
By: Faith Pearce
(3 min read)
I have always been an Alice in Wonderland fan after reading the books as a little girl and watching the modern adaptations of the movies. With Helena Bonham Carter’s portrayal of the Queen of Hearts and Johnny Depp as the Hatter. There are so many messages in the movies we can learn from, but I wanted to look at one today. The dark portrayal of the aspects of the mind and how things can get blown up out of proportion when we sit with them too long.
It can be easy to fall down the rabbit hole and feel the world is spinning around us. Like we are a passenger just watching life fly by. Where am I going with this?
You may have seen from my previous braindumps I can get stuck in loops, stuck in a thought process, going round and round and round. One thought leads to another and the rapid cycling begins. When you are in your own head, the rabbit hole is an endless tunnel. Once in the tunnel, we naturally notice things that align with our thinking. Accurate or not, we become validated, and these thoughts keep us stuck in the mud; stagnant.
This week I rented a car as I took my daughter to see a university. It was quite an experience as I have never been to one before. There were multiple talks inspiring the students to tap into their ‘Why’ and purpose. I wondered if I had been able to go to a university when my daughter was a baby, how would things be different now? We saw the student accommodation that had very basic amenities, but I saw many excited and nervous young adults who were eager to embark into the next phase of their lives.
The car I was driving was a 2018 model, and it’s been awhile since I have driven something so new. I don’t know if you can relate, but if you are a new owner of an Audi, it suddenly feels like every other car on the road is also an Audi. It was like this on our road trip. New cars were everywhere, but before the trip I hadn’t noticed one. I believe this is the theory of relativity.
What we focus on and surround ourselves with, multiplies. If you only notice the rain and gray clouds, you may miss the new shoots of life that are grateful for the drink of water.
Why did this jump out to me so much? Because I have always driven older cars, almost thinking I couldn’t have something so new, then something outside of my ‘normal’ came along, and it triggered a strong response.
In a similar way, I began thinking about when we meet new people; people who have totally different perspectives. We may question what they say or do. Why are they so abrupt, direct, or rude? We may wonder why they are poor listeners or wonder what is ‘their’ problem? We may not understand them, and blame them for being different.
On the other hand, there are those we meet who we instantly click with, who have the same stories, or same sense of humor. These connections are not always a family member, closest friend, or colleague. Often, it may be someone you barely know or a connection you feel to a random post on social media.
In Alice in Wonderland, whenever the Hatter starts to drift off into his past memories, Alice holds his face and says, “HATTER,” and this snaps him out of autopilot and back to the present moment.
To me, I see those who trigger me as playing the role of Alice. The “Alice” gives me the chance to stop and realize that I have been stuck down the rabbit hole and the trigger allows me to see things from a slightly different perspective. It gives me a chance to come back to the present moment.
I am grateful to all the people in my life who have been either a voice of reason or have pushed me to view things in a different way. Even if I feel resistance or a negative vibe, I am able to appreciate what I might not want in my life. I am better equipped to define my own boundaries by increasing my awareness.
The next time you feel triggered, maybe step back and breathe. It is an opportunity to investigate why the connection or observation is affecting you. It is your chance to see things from a different angle, and it gives you the power to consciously choose who is in your energy field and who is not.
Learn to protect your boundaries and ground yourself. You are being given a chance to stop spinning in circles stuck in your own head. And just maybe you will be able to see why we all need an “Alice” in our lives.